Thursday, January 10, 2013

Truth be told.

I thought of a thousand ways to get this post started. I thought of ways not to post this- but truth be told-I will.
Today happens to be my day off duty and I have spent it doing some thinking. Well, let's see-I had an hour to do some programming at work-then went to get a book from the library and watched Elementary as I braided my hair.
I have just finished taking my second cup of coffee for the day- and I thought, why not get something out of my system? See, people are like stores. They can take up only so much and without windows or constant fumigation they just lose it all. If that's just people-imagine a professional who is sworn to secrecy a.k.a confidentiality- imagine just how much such a person has to deal with. I have to admit that even Counselors have such a tough time holding so much in-even if they have supervisors-the vent or release never seems to make room for breathing.
So, now that I am taking this break from emailing my work schedule-allow me to engage you in a short non-humorous story.
Girl meets Boy. Boy likes Girl. Boy gets close to the Girl. He likes what he sees. He acts cool, rich and with such awesomeness that his courage attracts her attention. Girl sees Boy as a mystery. Girl loves mysteries-especially if they involve cute Boys who pretend to be what they are not. Girl asks Boy out-then she never shows up. She goes to their meeting place-and watched one story up- as he panics, waits for hours, tries to call her-then walks out twenty minutes later. Girl's conclusion: "Boys suck!"
I thought of this and smiled.
I have done nothing like what the Girl did (even though at times I wish I did)- but it got me asking-"is everything worth a test?"
In Psychology, it is always clear that things are not what they seem. You have to look into things and be as objective and even at times subjective as can be- to deduce what they are all about. And with that life is more like an iceberg-10% above water and 90% below water. I have often thought of it as a tedious job- and thanks to a friend, I realized that I do it so much that even those who have been mean-or rude to me simply get away with it. It's like you can be as mean as you can-but you ain't me. I have done that so much that when I heard the story I just told you a while back-it got me asking- "is everything worth a test?"
We can test objects, but what about every emotion we experience?
Can we put our fears and love to the test?
Can we even validate them as emotions?
Can we even say what these emotions are?
Truth be told-it's all up to you. You can decide to test every opportunity, emotion, or person. You can make them wait, or fail to show up. You can take in their anger and frustration and joy. You can do all that-simply because you can. In the end-you store up all these things and the only test you have is just how much you can hold in without losing it.