Thursday, April 16, 2015

3:AM Thoughts

If you ever find yourself awake and unable to return to sleep at 3:am then whatever you do, do not and I repeat, do not get out of bed, or so help you, you will be doomed to wander in a sea of thoughts.
I found myself awake not by default, but simply because my mind had had enough of rest and wanted to indulge me in a journey that I was not so pleased to embark on. I looked outside the window hoping to count the raindrops in the dark. After a while, I walked to the living room and sat down to write.
It has been a great week for me, because I have officially mastered the art of doing 30 squats, and twenty second wall-sits a day.
It has also been the week where everything I planned to do like clean and re-arrange my bedroom has constantly been postponed and I am afraid that today I will have to do it because I cannot find my favorite PVC eraser.
Grace is due anytime soon and we have been on the hunt for the perfect baby name for her beautiful daughter. She says that I cannot call her unborn daughter beautiful because I have not yet seen her, but I have a feeling that she would have her mother's nose and father's eyes. I had to sit down and listen to her argue with Joseph about the name of the baby. She wants something African and he wants to name her, Faith, after his mother. Grace went on a rant for close to twenty minutes and when Joseph turned to me for help, all I could say was "never argue with a pregnant woman, especially if she is your wife."
What's my take on baby names?
I don't have any really, save for the fact that I have always thought of naming my daughter (Lord, if ever I have one)- Aurora.
Yes, I want her to always get back up when she is pushed down or weighed down by life's challenges, just like dawn. There's always a new dawn. Sometimes when I ask people whether they were named after someone, I find myself seeing the other person in them.
I paced up and down the room for a while and made my way back to bed at 5am.
I thought about reading a book on Kindle, but I did not want to be all hot and bothered by a steamy romance novel at 5am.
Unable to sleep, I got out of bed and started asking myself what I would do next- and that's when it hit me that I have the ability to zone out and stay silent and that I could use it to my advantage. Over the years, whenever I have feelings that I cannot explain I always detached myself. And that's why based on my to-do list, I can write a novel titled, "Detached."
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Do not let anyone define you.