Never trust a Writer! We are so devious that whatever you do is like a story to us. We can make you a hero or a villain depending on our whims and at times we turn you into inanimate objects that characters can push around, step on or misuse. I'd say that doormats, combs, toothbrushes, toilet bowls, sinks, chairs...are some of my favorites.
The highest honor a writer can accord you as an inanimate object is by drafting you as a pen, paper, blank page on a computer or cup of coffee! I'd love to be drafted as a cup of coffee by some writer...it'd be forever the greatest achievement. I could slot it in my Google + profile as a bragging right.
But, I do have times when things weigh me down- and I had a sombre moment like that this morning. I was taking tea when this feeling overtook me and I couldn't shake it off. I'm a worrier- but today it was more like something was going wrong somewhere and I couldn't place it let alone prevent it. I worked on my report for my boss and emailed it to him- then checked out Deviant Art where I came across this:
And, this is where my Prince Charming came through- because in his own wicked way- he just called to wish me a good day, and the first thing I asked was where he was.
"Are you okay?" I asked immediately. He laughed and I stayed silent- because if there's one thing that is lost on me is patience. I want answers there and then- and when I get mad, I don't throw tantrums. I let my anger boil and then when it's lethal-I let it erupt and spill over like molten lava!
He stopped laughing and asked me how my day was, completely ignoring my question. "I asked you a question!"
"I'm fine. I am rather hungry if you want to know and I haven't got bread from the shop."
"Okay, that's good to know."
"Are you okay? I mean...is everything okay with you?"
"I'm fine." ( Now look who's lying.)
"No, you're not. Your voice is calm, and you are doing that thing with your voice again...acting all final like this conversation should end."
"Take care love, okay."
"Sure, see you when's possible." I smiled immediately after because having a Prince Charming is like having the one best friend who sees right through you and never questions your good and bad days.
But this post was not to tell you about him, rather about what it feels like when you are down or blue and you can't explain why. Someone might think you are in a bad mood or you woke up on the wrong side of the bed- and if you are a woman- then they'd jump to PMS! But, it's not so...at times you have to sort things out.
Your feelings and opinions about things can get so mixed up that the only way to clear it out is when you are feeling blue.
So, how do you go about it?
I reckon first things first is to create some space! Be by yourself, wallow in your thoughts and let it sink in.
If you love music like I do- then listen to something, and based on how down you feel- you'll tend to pick a very down song, but listen to it and continue to wallow in your thoughts.
With time you'd come to terms with what you are feeling- and figure out how to act on it.
There's nothing wrong with being by yourself, because there's so much serenity that comes when you are one with yourself.
Happy Easter holidays!